Celebrating my mom 49th b-day

It's my mom birthday today, but we didn't have any huge celebration, just a small dinner that i cooked up, Vietnamese Seafood Udon noodle aka Banh Canh Cua. Simple, yet effective, cause we over ate again, at 11pm, just right after my meatloaf dinner! while watching Hong Kong TVB's tv drama over the internet. hahaha

Getting my fav. job back!

Oct. 8th! yeah baby!

Damn old FARTS!

I had a mixed day on Sunday, it started out good, having brunch @ Mini/Wine Bar, bloody expensive! Brunch for you cost about $45 buck! i had the Japanese Wagu corn beef with poached egg, my friend Angel had the smoke salmon. Everything was peachy, showing him around town, then BAM, my car lightly bumped into this old couple car, i can not see any dent or scratches, but yet they said they their paint job is original, and it look like it has been scratched. His wife come out of the car, i asked her if she's ok, she kept shaking her head and said, "oh, my neck hurt, my neck hurt" i asked her again, she said she's "OK", but "You'll never know if it's hurting later" i was like WTF!!! i can smell a bunch of old fart scammers trying to squeeze money out of my insurance and i can see that my car insurance gonna go up right there!!! People are so fucking lame! i meant, i had people bumped my car before, but if i was ok, and i didn't see that much of a scratch or damage, i usually let them go. if i know they were trying to pull that shit, i could at least put a nice dent to their old ass fucking PT Cruiser! i hate fucking asses!

A lot to be thankful for!

When i thought that I'm about to run into a dead end, just in a nick of time, a new path has open up for me. Sometime things just start to happen for a reason that it's kinda weird to explain...

i started my new job this week at a salon down town, i haven't been working since summer, so naturally, i been so lazy that the thought of going back to work is something i do not enjoy! yet strangely, i do enjoy working here! The owners are the most lay back couple i have ever work for! i didn't have to do much, even when i'm actually working, they even rushed me thru the job, telling me to hurry up and don't pamper the customer! During down times, i get to read PLAY BOY magazines, now tell me if you can do that at ur job? hahaha... i love it!

Let's hope i'll last for the next 11 weeks of hard work before i'm in Asia again!

Cheap *ss Chienne!

Excusez-moi, mais qui pensez-vous que vous êtes?

Oui, who the fuck do you think you're?  I love making friends from all over the worlds, and i'm very fortunate to have met incredibly KIND, GENEROUS, FUN, and GENUINE people that i come in contacts with. 

But i can't always count on the good things and ignored those bad, spoiled, rotten apples that got mixed in my bag once in a while by mistake. Out side it look nice and shiny, but one bite, and you'll taste the poisonous juice that squirted out from the core, and the lingering after taste is not that easy to forget or go away! 

Why does some guys, especially narcissistic flaming TRANNY MESS faggots had to put up such a fake facade, USED people who think of them as friends, get whatever the fuck they wanted from their friends, and has the audacity to put up that all HIGH and MIGHTY bullshits?  When deep down inside, they know that they're one cheap ass mofo that no one want to hang out with, so they have to fool other people that they have the shit?  

other word, i HATE F*CKING USER CHEAP ASS BITCHES

Spare me the sparkles bitches, didn't you know that "Glitters" by Mariah is in the fucking dumpster? hahaha...

I thought i had to get this off my man's boobs, sometime i have to be a bitch to scratch the shitty gunk out of your eyes so you can see and treat your friends a bit better.

Lost!!!!

I'm so lost right now!!! As Chicago is getting colder, I'm already planning ahead what and where i'll be going in the coming months, they're all achievable IF i have extra MONEY!!! I have two destinations in my itineraries that i want to visit, Taipei and Ho Chi Minh city, but with the tourist Visa complications i'm having right now, just make it more difficult to plan and save money! To get a visa exemption from Vietnam, i have to have proper documents showing that i was born in VN, however, i'm a US citizen now, so my mom destroyed all those damn papers! making it almost impossible for me to get thing done. For Taiwan tourist Visa, the person working at the Taiwanese consulate asked me to have a itinerary for the trip to Taipei before they granting me a 2 months Visa, although i told her i want to stay for 3 months, she was saying something about I have to fly to HK, making it even more confusing for me. Plus...i can't get the damn itinerary until i know if i'm still going to Vietnam with my mom, making it a hair pulling experience for me, cause i felt like i'm chasing my own tail, don't know which i should do first!!! On top of that, all the major airlines now charging extra fee, plus any price different if i plan on changing my returning portion of my ticket! Damn those airlines trying to squeeze every pennies out of me! what to do!!! what to do!! i need to prioritize!!! and YES, i have to learn Mandarin if i plan on staying for a long visit in Taiwan! urgh!!!!!!!!!! my life is a damn DRAMA!!!!

who are your real friends?

I was chatting with an online friend from NYC tonight, which i have not chatted with him for over a month.  As we were talking, I found out that he just moved back to Taipei! How EXCITING!!! I bet after living in NYC for the past two years, he has had enough!  I don't blame him for it, i visited NYC for July 4th weekend this year, and frankly, i didn't enjoy the city as much as i thought. We went on and on to chat about Taipei, and why i should moved there and so on. 

I been contemplating of moving to Asia, getting a fresh start in my career and my personal life after i revisited Vietnam back in Oct. of 2007.  When i was in Vietnam, i also visited Taipei for the 1st time at the end of January of this year, a good friend persuaded me to give Taipei a try, and I instantly felt in love with Taipei.  Something about being in Asia, I don't know if it was the people, the food, the night life in Asia, or I just got sick of being in the cold, windy winter of Chicago's for almost 20 years.  I JUST WANT TO BE IN ASIA. anywhere but here during the long bitterly winter. 

My NYC's friend has offered to help me out if I'm planning on moving to Taipei, he even ENCOURAGED me to move there! which i thought it was like WOW!  After all, I'm a complete stranger to him, we have never met in person. That was the nicest gesture, which was kind of unexpected.  I THANKS him, saying that he doesn't have to do that, but he replied "I AM YOUR FRIEND".  YET I HAVE NEVER MET HIM IN PERSON.  While chatting with him, i was having another online conversation with my other friend from Hong Kong, which i had been friend with since Dec. 2007, and we also met up in Vietnam for a whole week when i was there.  I got a bit carried away with the thought of living in Asia, and i was trying to keep my options open for the possible cities i want to live in beside Taipei and Ho Chi Minh city. So i casually asked him if he can host me and help me out with housing if i decided to come to Hong Kong instead.  He said NO. This is the guy who supposedly LOVE me, wanted to marry me, he even proposed! BUT I NEVER ACCEPTED his proposal, cause i think it was kinda bogus!  

I'm slowly realizing that behind someone good deeds, are there an attachment to it? When i did a good deeds for someone like a friend, the only thing i expected out of that is a better bonding, a better relationship with the person i considered as a friend. I guess i do not want to be OLD and LONELY by myself. I'm human, and that's my insecurity.  SO I NEVER considered my self as an exception. But to other people, like that guy from Hong Kong, which i no longer considered as a friend, because he always looked down on me, the only time he look up to me if when i FUCKED him, which WILL NEVER EVER HAPPENED again. Whenever he did a good deed for me, I'm expected to return a a favor for him, like having sex with him, what am i? a whore??? the last time we chat, he was going to fly me to Hong Kong, but with a condition, i have to sleep with him, which i said NO!  it's so disappointing for me to realized that when i considered someone as a friend, or closed friend, all they want to from me, or think of me are just SEX SEX SEX. Or when i open my door to host a complete stranger from 1/2 way around the world like Taipei, all he think of me is that i wanted SEX from him. What the F*CK??? 

I'm not saying i'm above those guys, but there are places and times, if things are fall into place, and if the moment is right, it will HAPPEN! but if it's not, that's OK too! why does guys have to use sex as a leverage for everything? and scarified a good friendship? 

conveniently enough, my friend from Philly asked me if i'm feeling like hosting another guy named Rob, who just moved here from oversea, and need someone to show him around Chicago. So i told him flatly: i need a break from being too friendly to people, otherwise they think i wanted sex from them! hahaha

Summer of 2008

Today is September 2nd, 2008, to most Chicagoans, it's an official end to our summer. Labor day weekend for me usually go out with a BANG! every years for the past 3 years, my roommates and I used to throw a big summer party, we invited at least 60 or 70 of people we called friends over to our house for food, drinks and say good bye to our great summer.

This year, nothing! no party, no celebration of any kind. the bleakest summer i ever had, and it was a short one too! 

Am i complaining too much or is it because i'm getting older, and the same thing i used to enjoyed is not as fun anymore. Do you know what i did for this Labor day weekend? I SLEPT!!!  I got invited to go to a b-b-q at a friend house, supposedly went clubbing, i did none of those. 

The start of this summer, although it was a short one, i was hoping for a great summer like i used to had, Gay pride in June, go to Six Flags in July, and of course Market days in August. I was so excited that i made a bunch of new friends, all from far away though, and one from Chicago. I was hoping to have a great summer and shared good times with friends that has never visit this great city during the summer time. All of my anticipations turn out to be mediocre.  My good intentions were down the toilet.  I was trying to hard to pleased everyone else, make sure my friends all had a good time, in turn it got back fired.  Plus drama with an old friend, made this summer the worst to swallow. 

Now all of my friends or what not are gone, back to their daily routines. I'm left all alone again till next summer? Let's hope i get a better summer next year.

When I Grow up

"When I was just a little boy,

I asked my Mama: Mama, What will I be?

Will I be pretty with a big bootay?

Will I be the gayest with the bitchiest attitude?

or Will I be old and still act like a lil Shanequa down the block?

And here was her replied,

'No' to pretty and big bootay, you'll be an old hag.

'Yes' to the gayest and bitchiest

and 'YES' to the old and Shanequa thing."

Hahaha... Sorry for butchering up that "Que Sara, Sara" song, I was watching TV and there was a commercial for Panasonic plasma tv, and they were using that song, so it was stuck in my head all day. I had to come up with something funny to killed that damn song in my head, other wise it will stuck in repeat on my head until i blogged it on here! 

Which brought me to the next subject, when will I GROW UP??? 

Does the age of a person really have something to do with being a GROW UP???

I just turned 30 this year, and a BIG THANKS, or should i said slaps in my face from a certain person i ONCE CONSIDERED as CLOSED FRIEND, thinks that I'm pathetic for being a 30 years old and should acted my age. 

Then how do a 20's something years old should act for their age?

How do a 30's something years old like myself should act for my age?

How do a 40's something years old should act? and so on...

I never hide the fact that I'm 30 years old and acted like a child from times to times. However, in my defend, i do know when to do the GROWN UP things when dealing with others that cared a great deal.  Being a GROWN UP doesn't have to be with a particular age's group, i had seen guys in their TEENS acted very mature.  Being mature doesn't mean that you have to acted all stiffed, and lay down the laws, NO mean NO kinda things. 

Being a Grown up can means other things to me, such as:

Have some common decencies toward the people you called as friends

Don't take advantages of your friend's kindness and hospitality

Be NICE to your friends, they may not be the best @ the thing you do, but they'll make it up in other ways, that's why we all have friends! duh!

Have a basic etiquette when interact with friends and people you cared about. If your friend took a taxi to the airport to pick your ass up in a strange city, make sure you paid him back for or at least paid for dinner. 

And genuinely cared about your friends, be kinds to them, because friends are hard to find, and GOOD friends who give a shit about are HARDER to KEEP!

For me, I can still be all GROWN UP and at the same time  acted like a kid, cause i know which situations to applied myself in. Some people i knew claimed they're all grown up, college educated and such, yet they acted like an infant.  They can't even performed basic etiquette , can't even have some common decencies toward their friends. Now tell me, if I'm an immature 30 years old still know how to treats and take cares of my friends, yet i have to tell a college educated person how to acts and treats his friends, who's a GROWN UP now huh? ;-P

Just Because

Just because I enjoy travel, clubbing, and a labels whore. 
Yeah, I said it, labels whore. 
Doesn’t mean I am pretentious.
When i break down and cry on an upsetting situation, 

Does it meant that I'm feminine, flaming drama queen?
If it's, So what? You got a problem with that? 

People asked why should I cared so much about you?
I replied that's what FRIEND is for.
Did I mention I am scared to be alone? 
Am I confusing anyone yet? 
I am only human and a messed up one too. 

I am never tried to be perfect like some
I am always trying to please someone. 
You do not know what I go through. 
Let me tell you it is not fun going down on a one way street. 
 
You will say anything to get a cheap thrill out of me. 
I do not think you understand. 
It is like you are looking for a gentle heart to kill. 

Being burned for good intentions is hard to recover,
So please think before you speak, your kindness is genuine, and truly neat!